And the Lucky Winner is....

These are my friends....

They asked for my opinion and I gave it to them.

Look who won...

Fantastic Carmen is on the left. Jeff, the owner, is on the right. The LUCKY WINNER is in the middle!! A free refill card for me. What more can a Diet Coke addict ask for?

Opps!

My uniform at work is white shirt, black pants, black shoes, black apron. Something wasn't feeling quite right last night at work. 3/4's into the night I look down and notice a draw string on my pants. Well, all be darn, I was wearing my sweat pants at work! Luckily they were dark enough for no one to notice. We all had a good laugh.

Thoughtful Thursday

Thought⋅ful

–adjective

1.	showing consideration for others; considerate.

After dealing with a crabby lady yesterday, I decided I would start Thoughtful Thursday. The day that I make an effort to acknowledge any thoughtful acts of kindness I have witnessed during the week. Here goes:

On Monday I was going to a local sandwich shop to pick up my lunch. Knowing I would have the twins, I placed my order before going. That way I could just run in and grab it. As I arrived, I exchanged friendly gestures with a woman who was leaving as I was parking. I got out of car and she rolled down her window, "would you like me to watch your children as you run in? I notice you have two car seats in there." Wow, I was blown away! I kindly thanked her and she said "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" I wonder if she knew how much she made my day. I hope kindness was returned to her.

I would like to extend a challenge to all you bloggers and non-bloggers to participate in Thoughtful Thursday. If it's posting on your blog or leaving a comment on mine. Reading about your experiences helps me think of more ways to be a better friend/citizen. It's those simple things in life that make the biggest difference!

I'll Have A Blue Christmas Without You....

My house this Christmas season. I had better pictures but decided to use the glaring obnoxious photo so you can understand what it looks like. Andy came home one day and said he wanted blue lights outside of the house. I wasn't thrilled. I'm not a blue light person. "Whatever" was what I said when I agreed. When they were on the house I said "You know what this looks like, right?" I continued to tell him that our house looked like we are BYU fans. He said that it was more like an Elvis look and we should find his Blue Christmas song and play it outside. I didn't have a lot of comments about this. What was funny was the calls we received from our friends about the lights. Humorous comments on how they couldn't believe Andy had gone to the dark side. How disappointed they were in his choice of lights. I loved it!!!! He did not. He's been on the defense ever since. Now he's saying that color of our house represents the Utah Jazz. To his credit, he did do a nice job.

Speaking of BYU, this has to be one of my all time favorite pictures. I hope the co-worker of my friend, who took the picture, doesn't mind I've shared it all over cyberspace!

Hey Andy!

I just wanted to let you know that I crashed the car into the side of the garage today. You know how the snow gets too heavy on the tree and it's hard to see? Well, I was focusing on the snow and hit the garage. The damage isn't too bad, just a crack on the side of the car. You will either find it yourself and I'll confess or you will read about it on this blog. In case you are wondering, no one was hurt. A few words flew out of my mouth but I'm sure the babies don't understand what they mean just yet.

Love Ya Tons!

XOXOXO,

Your Devoted Wife and Mother of Your Children

Ode to Ralph

This is a picture of my dad, Ralph. He died when I was 18. When I was reading a humorous blog of my friend, Diane, I thought of a Christmas carol I sing every year. Connie (my childhood friend since I was 8), my sister, and I wrote it when we were young. I sing the song every Christmas without even thinking about it. I think I saw a picture of my dad with hair but always knew him as a baldy. We thought we were so funny when we wrote this song. It's a bit corny now.

Ralph the bald head father,
Had a very shiny head.
And if you ever saw it,
You would even say it's red.
All of the other fathers,
Use to laugh and call him names (like Kojak).
They never let poor Ralph,
Join in any father games (like football).
Then one foggy Christmas Eve,
Santa came to say,
"Ralph with your head so bright,
Won't you light my room tonight?"
Then all the fathers loved him,
As they shouted out with glee,
Ralph the shiny head father,
You'll go down in history (like Kojak)

Tis The Season To Be Jolly!

What a way to start off December! I am celebrating a couple of milestones....

BYE BYE BOTTLE PROPERS!

They saved my life. They saved everyone's life. Now it's time to say good bye because the babies can hold their bottles ALL BY THEMSELVES! Yahoo! I've anticipated this day from day #1 of their lives. I was more than happy to donate these beautiful gadgets to a new mom of triplets! I hope she enjoys them as much as I did.

BYE BYE BINKY!!

I say this with complete JOY: it's been two nights and NO BINKY!!! She hasn't wailed or fussed like she has in the past. Believe me, my name has been Shame and Disgrace as I have seen this da** binky in her mouth this past year. But with my plate full, I've let it go. It truly is a month of miracles to have this thing behind us.

UMM...NOT A MILESTONE

Not really a milestone but it something I will be seeing a lot of this month. Some of you may or may not know that I am a server at high-end dining establishment (that sounds less trashy than restaurant). I see this view every night I work in December. Actually, I don't see it but the guests do. I don't talk much about my job because it's a world of it's own. I also don't talk about it because it will eventually get me into trouble. Seriously, I get in trouble all the time there. I have decided to share any experiences that will be blogworthy. There's all sorts of drama that goes on. It's very entertaining. I really like my job. I like the people I work with. I like the guests I talk to. I feel like a normal human being when I go to work. I like my paycheck. The drama keeps me on my toes. It will be an entertaining month.

What a great post! I hope you all feel some satisfaction and can celebrate with me!

By the way for those of you who REALLY care, I lost one pound!!!!

Fashion Friday Foto

Got Prunes?

Twins 101

Warning the following blog may not be suitable for adults who have 0-2 children. Viewer discretion is advised....

1. Question: What do you do if you have one twin who doesn't sleep as much as her sister? Who has started crawling and eats everything off the floor? Who needs a little more attention than her parents can give her?




Answer: Trap her in a bunch of water bottles.

2. Question: What do you do if you are trying to make dinner, need to change a poopie diaper, and the other twin is crying?




Answer: Give her some chocolate.

Fashion Friday Foto

Miss Maggie Jane with piggy-tails. She wore them right before her haircut. She kept them in for about an hour. Here's a couple of self-esteem moments Maggie had this week...

Me: Maggie, you need to stay in the car with your sisters while I go get Max in the school. You're such a good babysitter. I know you'll do a great job.

Maggie: I'm not a good babysitter Mom. I'm a jerk.

Second moment...

Maggie: Max, you're a loser!

Max: No Maggie, you're a loser!

Love grows in abundance in this house.

My Conversation with Mr. Einfeldt

Short and condensed version.....

Mr E: Hello this is Steven Einfeldt Vice Principal of the elementary school.

Me: Hello....

Mr. E: I'm calling because your kids have had many tardies this school year.

Me: LOL! Yes, I am aware of this issue. I talked to the principal about it the other day. I told her that Michael's teacher is marking him absent RIGHT when the bell rings. blah blah blah

Mr. E: Ah, yes, I see that Max has 4 tardies and Michael has 10 and they are marked on different days. Well, is there anything we can do to help get your kids to school on time?

Me: Laughing very loudly... Yes, you can take them to school every day.

Mr. E: Laughing and blah blah blah

Me: Look, it's been an adjustment for me to deal with the twins and get the boys out the door. Just so you understand what my days are like, I'll tell you what happened today. I had run errands all morning. I had to pick Max up from school because he was sick. I was leaving the school and noticed my shorts were on inside-out. I walked around all morning wearing my shorts inside-out. Now do you understand where I am coming from?

I think he got the picture.

Vegas Baby!

Andy and I went to Vegas last week. Andy had a business trip, I invited myself to go along.

We stayed at Bally's. Here's a view from our room. The hotel we stayed at was okay. It was free, what can I complain about?

I didn't like that Bally's served Pepsi products. I did like the Coca Cola store I visited twice.

We saw a great show, The Blue Man Group. I totally recommend it. We sat in the front row. The reason why the front row was the least expensive was the flying paint that was a part of the show. Here's a pic of us with the ponchos they provided.

We didn't get sprayed with paint but we ended up with a bunch of paper all over us. We hung out with two of Andy's co-workers. They were so much fun, we laughed the whole time.

What do you think of my new movie star glasses? I felt like the paparazzi was following me everywhere.
Vegas isn't Vegas without seeing Elvis
If you happen to see this cab driver, RUN! He had us laughing so hard we were crying. He was also completely INSANE!!

The conservative side of me was in SHOCK with the "sin" aspect of Sin City. Let's just say I won't be taking my kids there... EVER! Overall, it was a fantastic trip. Thanks Becky for watching all five of my kids so I could go!

See Ya!

Dear Facebook Friend,
Look, I really like Facebook. It's been a great tool for me to get in touch with old friends, new friends, and great friends. I consider you a fun friend from the past. Unfortunately, I do not like swearing. Sure, a few words come out of my mouth sometimes, that's beside the point. What you said was a wee bit too harsh for me. So...........I deleted you. And about the Prop 8 deal, sorry it didn't turn out the way you wanted it to. Do you have to be so mean about it though? I'm staying neutral on the issue so don't start leaving negative comments. But, yes, I was a little offended at your comment. Let's make Facebook a positive place for all of us. I'm trying very hard to get Katy on there and if I have to express negative things about Facebook she's not going to join. Enough said. By the way Brian, check on your Facebook, this time it may have been you.

Gobble Gobble

It's that time of year when we all think about the things we are thankful for. Though I am not committing myself to blogging something I'm thankful for every day this month, I'm starting this month by expressing something I am thankful for. I'm thankful that Max's football season is over. Don't get me wrong, it was an exciting season. Lots of parental politics. Lots of coaching politics. It was fun watching Max make a couple of touchdowns. I learned that he is a pretty good player.

BUT football season isn't over. We still have one more month of Utah football. The big game is this Thursday, Utah vs TCU. (can you believe I even know that?) Anyway, I thought I'd share one of my most favorite blog entries by my friend Misty. Actually her husband, Mike, wrote the entry. LOVED IT!!!! This is dedicated to all those wives and children who have been baptized by the football-addict in their lives....

Having "The Talk" with Haley

By Special Guest-Blogger Mike

Its been one year now since I sat down with my oldest daughter, Haley, for our first official talk about the facts of life…or as we call it at our house…“The Talk.” I remember how awkward I felt in the days leading up to "The Talk." Those were nerve-wracking times.

Would I be able to tell her what she needed to know?

Would she understand the importance of what I had to say?

Would I gross her out?

But despite my feelings of inadequacy, I knew I had to have this conversation with her. Sure, she was only six at the time...but it wouldn’t be long before she would be a young woman. Already she was being exposed to things and ideas at school over which I had no control. She needed to hear straight talk...and as her father, it was my job to do it.

So I pulled her aside one Saturday morning. I chose a quiet place in our home, where we could be alone and where we wouldn't be interrupted. I looked at her gently and told her the truth about life's most important things.

"Sweetheart," I said. "You are a Ute fan."

Haley smiled eagerly and nodded her head with understanding.

"And not just a Ute fan," I continued, emboldened by her response. "Because you are a Mayfield, it means that you are a hard-core Ute fan. And that means two things."

"First, it means that you will be disappointed in life...a lot."

"Second, it means that no matter how bad a game is, no matter who we are playing, no matter what the score is, and no matter how bad the weather...Mayfields never leave a game early. We don’t leave Church before the closing prayer and we don’t leave games before the final gun---got it?"

Haley wrapped her little arms around my neck. "Dad...I already know all of this stuff. I'm ready."

A rush of relief flooded my body. I had done it. I had raised my little girl to be a runnin' Ute fan right smack in the middle of cougar country. I looked proudly at Haley and said, "Then I will take you with me to the football game today."

Haley quickly dressed for the game: Waterproof coat and pants. Boots. Rain poncho. It was a little overkill, but she was a rookie. I didn’t want to curb her enthusiasm.

We went to the game against Utah State University and sat down in the cool September evening. Before long, the air got cooler. I even started to shiver a little bit in my thin jacket and t-shirt. But, I was a veteran. I had sat through much worse.

Then it began to rain and then snow. Haley sat happily in her seat, totally dry, sipping on a jumbo cup of hot chocolate. I, on the other hand, began to shake as the wet snow seeped through my t-shirt and the wind ripped through my ironically named wind-breaker. Quite simply...I was freezing. And yet, I could not leave. Not after the Talk. Not after explaining the facts of life to my little girl.

At half-time, all the players ran off the field and the fans poured out of their seats to get shelter by the concession stands. Haley looked up to me and said "Is the game over, Dad?"

And that is when I saw...an opportunity.

I looked at my lovely, trusting daughter and said, "Haley, I love you. And I could never lie to you.....Yes, the game is over! Let's get the heck out of here!"

Sure I felt like a failure as a father, but the nice thing about life is you often get a chance to repent, to be better, to make amends.

My redemption came last Saturday. I took Haley to the Utah vs. CSU game...the whole game. And my undefeated Utes won 49-16 on a beautiful, fall afternoon.

It was Haley's second full game...as far as she knows.

Life is good.

The Trickster

Did you ever use the word "goober" in high school? My friend Cyndie and I use to use the word goob. I think Andy looks like a goob here. In a goofy way, Andy, don't be offended. None-the-less, he was quite the trickster this Halloween.

Maggie was a robot. I had a few issues with the costume (I wanted her to be a princess) but it all worked out. She's holding an oil can that she used as her candy bucket. When she pressed a button it said "take me to your leader." It was pretty cute.
Max was a knight....
Michael was Obi-Wan Kenobi (it took me way too long to find the correct spelling for Obi's name)...
Kate and Claire were spin-offs from a costume I saw in a catalog. The costumes were home-made. I will never make a costume again. Becky (my friend) helped me with the tu-tu's. The shirts I made BOO! out of felt and stuck it on. The caps I bought for them were supposed to have ghosts on them but they ended up being too small. How could these girls not look cute?
Whew! I'm glad Halloween is over. Now that I have 5 kids to wrestle during this event I'm happy it only comes around once a year!

Retreat

The thought of a retreat sounds divine. When I think of a retreat I think of a weekend away with girlfriends. We laugh, talk, and eat. After the retreat I feel rejuvenated and ready to go back to motherhood. A couple of weeks ago I learned that "retreat" also means a type of root canal. It's a root canal that has already had a root canal. Makes me a little ticked at the previous dentist for doing a crappy job the first time. Have you had a root canal? They aren't pleasant. There's something horrid about a drill going up into my tooth. As the Dr. drilled and jabbed, I clenched my fists in fear that the Dr. was going to hit a nerve that hadn't been numbed. With this piece of plastic covering my mouth I couldn't see any of the tools. I could only feel the pressure of the jamming and hear the drill drilling. Two hours of it makes for a long day. It ain't no retreat with my friends! I had the first part of the root canal done a couple of weeks ago. The Dr. expressed some concern that he was seeing black on paper he was shoving into my roots. He wanted to keep some medicine in my roots and I'd come back and see him in a couple of weeks. Isn't that reassuring when your Dr. says there's black up in your roots? So I went back yesterday to finish the process. This time he mentioned that he can see a piece of the file that had been lost in my canal the very first time I had the root canal. The file was a very thin piece of wire or metal of some sort. When the first Dr. was jamming it up my roots it must have broken off. The dentist told me that he can't get it out, it would be too hard to retrieve it. I guess I'm lucky that a metal detector hasn't gone off because of the metal that is permanently stuck in my mouth. I understand that there are a lot worse things in life. My next door neighbor is going through chemotherapy. That is bad. But I am going to take a brief moment to express my discomfort for the couple of hours I sat in that dental chair. Next week I am going to Vegas. Now that is my kind of retreat!!!

Family Update

My mom mentioned I haven't posted recent pics of the family so I thought I'd give you a family update.

Andy and Alison

Our friends invited us to their Spooky Kooky Halloween Party. I will post more pics later. The theme of the party was Pirates so we chose to be parrots. It was a blast.

Kate and Claire

Our sweet babies. They are a blessing in our home and are loved by everyone! If we were to have planned ahead we'd have Kate be an angel and Claire be the devil for Halloween. Kate, is an angel. She sleeps through anything. She rarely fusses and is so laid back. Her smile makes your heart melt. Her hair is quite funny right now. It's long on the top but thin everywhere else. It's kind of a mohawk.
Claire is a spitfire of a baby! Her cry is loud and distinct. Her feelings are expressed clearly! She'll cry and and cry and when you finally look at her she's all smiles. Her smile is huge. She is so bright and cheerful. Her laugh is contagious. Claire is the mover. She rolls around everywhere. Kate is content to stay in the same place. The girls are almost 7 months old.

Michael

Micheal is a bright boy. I love watching him do his homework (when he's cooperative) because he takes so much pride in what he does. When he gets home from school he takes his homework out and gets right to it. I have no idea what side of the family that came from. He is way into Webkinz. I don't know who is more addicted to the computer me or Michael.

Maggie Jane

Self-portrait taken. Maggie always has us laughing. She had a very hard time going to preschool this year. I was very surprised because I thought she'd take right to it. After a month of crying and disrupting the class I took her out. I put her in another preschool (she knows her teacher from church) and she is doing great. She's figured out how to take the "child proof lid" off the Motrin bottle and takes a few swigs now and then. Her largest dose has been half the bottle. Instead of saying her "v's" she says "b". So she'll say "I lub you Mom." What a cutie.

Max

Another self-portrait. It is fun to see Max play with the twins. He loves the twins as well as any baby he sees. He knows how to make them laugh. Max LOVES football. About a month ago he was talking about a score from a football game last year. I couldn't believe he remembered all the stats. He can't apply the same logic to his school work though. I don't get it. He is a great big brother.

Becky

Technically, Becky is not a member of the family, but in spirit she is!! This amazing woman has had the twins sleep over at her house since the girls were like 3 or 4 weeks old. Once a week she has taken the babies into her home so I could get some sleep. Maggie stays at her house for hours on end. Even when Becky's girls are at school, Becky still has Maggie come over and play. She takes Maggie to the store with her and they go all around town together. I never imagined I would have someone so willing to help me. When I grow up, I want to be just like Becky!!

That's my family recap. Consider this your letter in my Christmas card.

Her Special Day!

Today is that special day for my sister, Gretchen. She's turning 41. Sorry Gretch, no surprise party for you on my end. But I will wish Gretchie a happy birthday Diane style....

G - generous
R - retro queen
E - environmentally friendly
T - terrific
C - cherub
H - hilarious
E - everyone's friend
N - never a dull moment

Pop on over to Gretchen's blog and wish her a happy birthday.

There's my dedication for you Gretch. Hope it's a great one!

Excuse Me!

We went to Park City for the weekend to watch Max's football game. Saturday morning we were leaving the table after breakfast and Maggie had a special announcement. She jumped off her chair, and opened her arms as though she finished a fantastic dance routine. She loudly announced "I FARTED". I quickly looked around the restaurant to see if anyone else heard. They did. The expression on my face did not say "I'm so embarrassed" nor did it say "Maggie, watch your manners". The expression on my face said "welcome to my life." I know I'm not alone in my experiences like this. In fact, feel free to leave a comment about your most embarrassing moment where your child "passed gas". Now, I'm not trying to be gross or crude by talking about this subject because it is what it is, a fart is a fart. So that I don't offend any readers I'll try not to use that word so much. Your child won't avoid using the word but I will. First, if you want to read a funny definition, go on over to Wikipidia and read this. Have you ever wondered why God created our bodies to pass gas? I think it's so that we will continually have a sense of humor. Children make it funnier. Adults, I think it's gross. I think it's gross because I've never experienced gas before. Just heard and smelled it. There's really nothing like being on a treadmill and realizing the person next to you had eaten a large portion of fiber the day before. Isn't it interesting that we don't laugh at someone who is whistling but we laugh at someone who let-one-go? Last night Max was laying on the bed and said, "I let one rip!" Thanks Max, we all wanted to know that. Most adults try to keep gas a secret but kids are PROUD of what they can make. Well, some adults have let-em-rip contests. Max comes home from school telling me what so-and-so had for lunch because he experienced the after effects of it. One day Michael came home from school crying because he tooted in class and everyone made fun of him. Like I said, it is what it is, and they aren't going anywhere. One last mortifying experience to share. Max enjoys telling everyone how gross "it" was when I was pregnant with twins. Wait, I just said I've never had that problem before.

Shame on You!

To My New Friend on Facebook:

So what's up with the "naughty" picture you posted on your page? There are several reasons why I think it was totally inappropriate to put that on there:

1. I never wanted to see a picture of you naked.

2. Now that picture is on my computer and I don't know how to get it off a MAC.

3. I like Facebook because it's not so slutty like Myspace. How can I tell friends to join, when people like you, post pictures like that?

4. I have kids. Even though you may have thought of it as entertaining, not everyone does.

5. If you want to take photos of yourself like that, I don't care, but please don't share!

I don't think you'll ever read this. If you do, I have to be a real "friend" by telling you that I was the one who reported your picture to Facebook.

Sincerely,
Your Conservative Friend

Are you Green?

"When I was growing up" green had a different meaning than it does now. We'd always choose the green M&M's because it meant that we were horny. Whatever. I don't even think I knew what that meant. Now days, green means being earth friendly. I am not very green. I don't do things to destroy the planet but I don't live my life thinking green. My sister, she's very green. She's so green that I find it fun to tease her. She did tell me about this product and I use it on a daily basis. It has a weird smell but I am getting use to it.


One place that isn't green.... the Carl's Jr. playland. Okay, I know, it's probably not going to kill our environment but the place is nasty. There are pros and cons to taking your kids to a playland. One pro is that lunch is served and you don't need to do the dishes. Another pro is that you can talk to your girlfriends while your kids play. This is especially handy when it's crappy weather outside. The biggest problem with a playland is how disgusting it is. Dirty, stinky, sick kids all playing in the same spot. I usually bring baby wipes to wipe off my kids feet when they are done playing. Here are a few horror playland stories I will share with you:

1. While my friend was at Carl's Jr. (many years ago) her boys had to go to the bathroom. She took them to the restroom and the boys found a toilet brush that looked like a giant toothbrush. One of her children decided to use it to brush his teeth. Gag!

2. While I was chatting with a friend at McDonald's a friendly man asked us if we knew whose son was wearing a red shirt. That would be mine. Someone spilled their drink on the floor and Max was licking it up.

3. Finally, the other day I took the kids to Carl's Jr.. I needed a break. Desperate times call for desperate measures. When we were done and I was loading the kids into the car. I noticed how BLACK the kids feet were. Oh, it was gross. It took about 10 wipes to clean Michael and Maggie's feet. I threw the dirty wipes on the floor and headed home. When I arrived, I went to the back to get the babies out. Maggie decided to hand the dirty wipes to the twins and they each had one in their mouth. Ugh!

Maggie has already had Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease so if the twins get it, it won't be anything new.

Michael has been doing really well in school. He could chose any restaurant to eat at and he chose Burger King. The most disgusting playland ever where they still have those plastic balls to play in. As the kids piled out of the car they had a look of disappointment. They had remodeled the place and the playland was gone! "Darn it," I sarcastically said to myself. They still wanted to go in and we had a good time despite the lack of plastic balls. Thanks Burger King for going green, or I guess I should say for going clean! (that last sentence was pretty corny, wasn't it?)

Fashion Friday Foto

Look who turned 6 months today! I love this dress that we received as a baby gift. Kate was asleep when I took this picture. Their arms barely fit in their dresses. I hope I can get one more wear out of them.

Parenting 101

Directions: Read the following scenario and answer accordingly....

Your child comes home from school. Let's say his name is.....um.....Michael. It's important for Michael to do his homework before his soccer game. You sit down to try and help him. As he is working, he starts up with the "drama". He acts as though he has never seen a pencil. He acts as though he has never seen homework. He gets mad and throws his work on the floor. You try and remain patient but start getting frustrated. You eventually get up from the table because you can no longer tolerate his behavior. You notice the clock says 5 p.m., look at the soccer schedule, and realize the game starts at 5 not 5:30. You tell Michael to get his clothes on. He acts as though he has never worn a soccer uniform nor has ever worn a pair of shoes. In the meantime, you are trying to get bottles ready and babies in the car (one is screaming). You arrive at the soccer field. No close-up parking spots. You have to park down the street and haul everyone up the hill. Michael refuses to help you with anything . By this time you feel like a cartoon character with a bright read face and steam coming from your head. You hope no one gets in your way for fear you might scream "bite me".
You get everything set up (chairs, babies, bottles, etc.) and start watching Michael play soccer. Suddenly you realize you should cheer for him and support him. But you don't have one nice bone in your body for this boy. What's the "correct" parenting response?

A. Cheer for every player BUT Michael.

B. Cheer for him. Tell him he's doing an awesome job and he's the greatest soccer player ever.

C. Pick up your things and run away, leaving Micheal on the soccer field, hoping he finds his way home.

What's the correct answer? I have no idea, the game ended 5 minutes after we got there.

Notes to the Universe..

Dear Claire,
Why can't you be more like your sister, Kate, and sleep better?

Dear Jim,
Thank you so much for proposing to Pam last night. I loved it!

Dear Max's Teacher,
Will you notify me, as soon as possible, how I did on my project that Max turned in? I'm hoping I got a good grade.

Dear Kate,
Thank you for sleeping while your twin sister screams her head off.

Dear Lady at the Soccer Game Last Night,
I'm really happy for you and your "enhancement". But, come on, do you really have to wear that outfit to your child's soccer game? Didn't you feel embarrassed having to adjust your shirt the whole night?

Dear Makers of Enfamil,
Why don't you have a twin discount on your formula?

Dear Football,
Why?

Dear Gayle King,
Can I be a host with you on your radio show?

Dear President Bush,
What the heck happened to our economy? Do you think you can take out a small portion of the billions of dollars and send some to me? I'd like a pool and my basement remodeled.

Dear Sugar,
Why do I enjoy you but my body doesn't?

Dear Kitchen,
Why do you get messy after being clean for only 10 minutes?

Dear Blogger.com and Facebook,
Why do you suck me into your spell and I manage wasting time viewing you? See above question.

Dear Inventor of Diet Coke,
What more can I say but "I Love You".

Dear Blogging Friends,
I think you're awesome! Thanks for keeping me entertained.

It's "that time"

If you notice, I'm posting this at 3 a.m. I should not be awake at 3 a.m.. The babies are too big to be hungry at this wretched time. So I am declaring tomorrow night to be "the night". The night they have to cry-it-out. I've been making them cry-it-out at nap time for a while now. Since I can't take care of 5 children at once, they cry often. Overall, these babies are angels. Their personalities are SO easy going. Unfortunately, they are waking up at night more than necessary. I am putting a pacifier in Claire's mouth at least 2 times before 3 a.m.. Yes, it's time. I'm a firm believer in crying-it-out. I just haven't done it with two at the same time, or even different times in the night. I give them three days, at most, and then they are sound sleepers. What's three days when I've been waking up with these babies for 5 months? Look out Ambien, (my most favorite drug) here I come!

Fashion Friday Foto

Don't ask me what Andy does when he's in charge. I just came home and found this Hershey's Kiss. Or is it an antenna? It could be an alien. Who knows but we all had a good laugh with this one.

Football Freaks!

I've come up with a new title for a post that I am sure will be published often. Football is too entertaining to not write about. Please, any football moms out there, feel free to comment...

1. The other day the football game was on TV. San Diego vs. Notre Dame. The volume was off. The radio was also playing the BYU game in the same room. Two games going at once. What more can we do to get another game on in the same room?

2. Max's teacher emailed me. She said that Max wouldn't sign a school poster committing to read 30 minutes a day. I told Andy about it. He failed to tell me about a previous conversation he had with Max. Max told Andy about the poster and that he wouldn't sign the poster. Andy asked why. Max's response, "I've got football". Andy explained that he will be signing the poster and will be reading 30 minutes a day.

3. Max played at half-time at a local football game. One of his teammates tackled Max before Max could tackle another player. After the game Max asked the kid "why did you tackle me?" The kid explained that in order to get his $11 he needs to tackle someone. So he tackled Max so he could tackle the opposing team player. I'm anxious to talk to the mother of the kid who gets $11. I have a friend who buys PS2 games for her son if he plays really well each game. I am sure Andy is bribing Max with something but they won't tell me what it is.

4. The picture of Max was taken on a day that Max was wearing colorful underwear with his white pants. We all got a good laugh from it. The uniform is one of my most favorite thing in sports.

Fashion Friday Foto

This picture makes me laugh. Maggie's first day of preschool. Can you tell she didn't want her picture taken? She insisted on wearing her cheerleader outfit to school.

Polytyx

Confession: I got a D-- on my first political science test in college. Political Science was the hardest class I ever took. My final grade was a C-. I seriously believe that the teacher felt sorry for me and gave me that grade. Can you understand why I am not into politics? I have friends who will vote for McCain. I have friends that are voting for Obama. I honestly have no idea who I will vote for in this next election. I don't get politics. It seems to me that everyone is a big liar. I'll listen to a republican talk show and think "yes, that guy has a point". The same for the democrats. Then, I hear everybody bash each other. Then, everyone digs up dirt on everyone else, once again bashing each other. And for some reason, being mean, rude, and backstabbing is okay. And I am supposed to choose one of those people to be the leader of the country? I do have concerns about gas prices but what does a woman's pregnant daughter have to do with that? I guess it's all politics, which is why I don't understand politics. Many years ago, my friend told me that I was ignorant. I asked her what ignorant was. Duh! I've come a long way since then but the political thing, I just don't get.

Thanks Rich!

Who's this guy? Richard Lindon. Thanks to Rich we now have the football. He is believed to have invented the football with rubber bladders. Lovely. Footballs were first made with pig bladders. Think about that the next time you're watching the game. Yes indeed, it's that time of year! It all started August 1st when Max began football practice. The big day is this Saturday when the Utes play at the Big House. Two from this household are going. One isn't me. I get to stay home with our other 4 kids. Did you just ask me if I have issues about this? I actually don't have issues with them going. I know they'll have a blast.

Who would think I would have a long post about football? Here are some random facts about my life with football.

1. My dad use to watch football ALL the time. I use to think it was all the time. It was only Sundays and Mondays "back then." He would fall asleep while watching it. My sister and I would change the channel while he was snoring. I wanted to watch Little House on the Prairie. As soon as we would change the channel he'd wake up instantly and say "HEY! I was watching that." Whatever Dad!

2. My dad would take me to Oakland Raider games as well as San Francisco 49er games. I really don't think I watched it. I am sure I cared more about the food.

3. Claim to Fame: My dad was friends with John Madden. I have no idea why they were friends but I am positive my sister can tell you. She remembers EVERYTHING.

4. I didn't realize how obsessed Andy was with football until we were first married. It was raining outside so Andy opted to watch the game at home. When he turned it to the local station he WAILED "It's an infomercial!" We then got on our rain gear and headed to the stadium. All of Andy's friends thought I was the "coolest" wife to sit out in the rain during the game. I thought I was insane.

5. I can never remember how to play the sport when the season starts. By the end of the season I remember most of the rules. I have to start all over again when the season begins.

6. There are way more politics involved when watching your child's football game. We've done soccer, basketball, and baseball. By far, football is the worst. Every parent knows the game perfectly and is a way better judge than the coach or referee. If you dislike the all-knowing football parents I recommend you sit by me.

7. I hear about football ALL SEASON long. If it's not about Max's games, it's about the U. Not only after the game but during the week as well. We record all Utah games on our TV. Andy watches the games over and over. I ask him why he watches them so much and he says it's something about the plays.

8. I guess being obsessed with football is okay. It gives people something to look forward to. Just like the new obsession with the Twilight series, people are obsessed with football. Another note, I have not read one of those books and probably never will. I do have other things I look forward to like my daily doses of Diet Coke and the season premiere of The Office. What happens when the Utes play on a Thursday, the same night as The Office? Luckily our recorder will tape both at the same time.

Now....go play ball!!!

I'm It!

I like doing TAGS because it gives me something to write about.

3 Current Goals:

a. Goals?

3 Current Obsessions:

a. my flower garden
b. Facebook
c. sleeping

3 Fears

a. Nielsen's closing
b. uncontrollable situations
c. how I am going to do it all with 5 kids.

3 Random Facts

a. I love popcorn: microwave popcorn, air popcorn, movie popcorn and caramel popcorn. I use to not care much about it but I really like it. Especially with a large Diet Coke (not with the caramel).
b. I use hair conditioner on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. I set up that schedule because I always forgot when I used it. Do you ever take a shower and forget if you washed your hair? Always happens to me.
c. This is my FAVORITE commercial of the summer. I can watch it on YouTube over and over. You seriously need to watch this!

3 people to tag: Lindsay, Celeste, and Gretchie. I'm skipping you, Jayci because you get tagged all the time. I'm giving you a break! Have fun!

Superman vs. Supermom

Does this picture look familiar? Yeah, it's Andy. A couple of months ago a friend was telling me about something she noticed. Isn't it interesting when a dad takes all his kids to the store people tell the dad what a great and brave dad he is? Just a wonderful husband and father. Whereas, when a mom takes the kids to the store...nothing. Mom's just take the kids to the store. Maybe even getting some judgemental looks from perfect parents. Let me tell you, Andy has stepped up to the plate. Somehow he managed to take all 5 kids to the high school football game Friday night. He wasn't even crying by the time he got everyone in the car and arrived to the game. Notice how I didn't say the kids weren't crying, HE wasn't crying. He might as well as received a gold medal when he told me all the comments he got about his "bravery". At least when Andy takes all the kids he appreciates my job a little more. Someone was telling me that men take their kids to the park as a way to pick up a new girlfriend. I guess it makes the man look all motherly and responsible. I say, go ahead I could use the extra help!

Chillin'

What do you think of these new chairs I got for the girls? I bought them for many reasons, one being their necks. Another reason was to get them off their flat heads. Claire (on the right) can sit in the chair for a long time. Kate, her neck isn't so strong so she either leans forward or starts to cry after 5 minutes or so. I love putting them in there. We all love it.

Yo Mama!

A friend of mine had a discussion a while ago about being a mama. She is a bit older than me and had an insight that I have thought about since that time. I'm interested to hear what you think. I only want HONEST answers and anonymous guests are welcome.

Our discussion was based on the expectations of moms. The pressures that moms feel to have "perfect" children, houses, bodies, and lives. My friend said that she didn't feel that pressure as a mom but can see that it's an issue now. I totally agree with her. I feel that pressure and I feel a lot of guilt. This in not an invitation to tell me I am a good mother. Though that would be very nice, I'm not going to believe it unless I believe it myself first. I'm interested to know if you feel guilt as a mom. If someone comes into your house and it's messy, are you mortified? Do you feel pressure to fit a mother mold? Do you feel like you're a good mom? Do you feel guilt that you don't meet the mold? If you feel like you're a good mom, do you feel that it's easy? Do you ever feel like your children are better than others? I don't expect other to be perfect though I expect myself to be. It's a relief to learn that others lives aren't perfect yet it's still easy to pin imperfection on myself. At times, it's easy to place imperfections on others only to make myself feel better.
If you feel at complete peace as a mom and your job as a mom, let me know how it's done. I'm not interested so much in you telling me what to do but what YOU do.
I'm going to clean my house now.

Two Thumbs Up!

Two movies in one week! Never thought that would happen. When one considers entering the mental ward in the hospital, try going to these movies first. One will have you laughing, one will have you crying. If you aren't in the crazy mental state that I am in, you may not cry during the movie. It's is a GREAT chick flick! If you need someone to go with you, to either one, I'm here for ya!

Cake

It was Michael's birthday last week. I took the camera to the place where we had his party but this was the only picture I got. Between watching Maggie and feeding the babies, I didn't have a chance to get a picture of the birthday boy. I took this picture of his cake in the car on the way home. I can only laugh at this picture because it represents my life right now. We're getting by, but just barely. Things will calm down when school starts. I'll just keep laughing until it does.

Nick

Maggie was outside tonight (it was probably 10 pm) riding her tricycle in her underwear. She was saying " I love Nick. I am going to kiss Nick. I am going to break-up with Nick." Most moms would know she is talking about Nick Jonas. I would much rather hear her say that about Nick than what she was singing the other day... "I kissed a girl and I liked it." Yes, I didn't get to the radio fast enough to turn that song off.

I try to be a good mom, really, I try.